Conversation Under A Street Light

The terror in the leaving. Everyone always does.
She is your eternal loss.
Shocked by the echo left behind constantly reverberating off your soul.
You search...
A connection without connecting. (Some would mock you for it but you know what is good for you.)
Hoping
Mourning
A window to the outside world without the hazzard of feeling anything.
Voulnerability with a safety net... Simplicity
Reconstructing the demoliton left by her echo
Peace by Piece

MAC...10.28.2007

Expect nothing and you get nothing...
I fell apart when I thought you would leave me but when it happend I stood tall.
When I expected you to be a man and a boy showed his face I became the woman I am .
When I had to give up the life, the love, and the friends I had to save myself from you
I never expected you would be the best worst mistake I ever made.
When the whole world was crumbling and a life was in the balance
I never thought to call you for a shoulder to cry on.
When the balance tipped - MY son lived
I never thought to call you to tell you his name and you never called to find out.
When I looked into my sons eyes I began to feel sorry for you...
I realized then I not only saved me from you but him as well.
I knew then that you made your decision and you don't deserve my pitty.
When I made my mind up to forgive you - I let you go.
In the still of the night, I promised my son I would do better for him than you.
I promised my son that he would be loved .... unconditionally!
When I accomplished all of that ...
I forgave myself !